Reference no: EM133306836
Discussion 1
Positive Instructions vs. Negative Commands For children to thrive and blossom and become the responsible adults we need them to be, we need to provide them with a loving, nurturing, safe and fun environment, all while letting them be free to explore safely. Children also need to learn proper communication skills, either through sign language or by learning to use their words. Adults can be great role models to children, by "demonstrating calm and peaceful conflict management, demonstrate cooperation, empathy, and generosity in my day-to-day actions" (Positive Focus 7.17, p.192). Negative commands may hurt the child's feelings, causing them to feel invisible and not heard, and may cause social and emotional issues later down the road. Young children, especially toddlers, need to be spoken to in short simple phrases because they don't have all the communication skills they need to comprehend yet. Adults tend to forget what children can and cannot understand, some adults may become frustrated and yell at the children causing the child to become upset and confused. Negative commands only get you a quick fix solution, it only solves the problem right then and there; the children don't learn anything from that interaction. Negative commands can cause children to have poor self-regulation skills, anger problems, cause retaliation. Children need to be respected, they have human rights too. They don't comprehend why they're being yelled at or even being spanked; some parents do spank their kids. Children need to be explained why things are happening and given reasoning, it's like cause and effect, and they have tons of questions. As the nurturing adults in the children's lives, we must provide them with those answers through a positive, effective, and caring relationship.
Miller, D. F. Positive Child Guidance, 8th Edition, Cengage
Discussion 2
Being a spirited child compared to a normal child per se means that these children are more sensitive and perceptive and are prone to be slower to adapt to new situations. Spirited children are more sensitive than "normal" kids, they can be intense people. They can become extremely upset and can create such loud disturbances it hurts to listen when they don't get their way. Paying close attention to cues, maybe background music or from my experience, what I like to do is get to know the families and get as much background information as possible; things that trigger the child to become upset or ways to help soothe and calm the child. The spirited child can also be persistent, they don't want to take no for an answer and feel as if they can do everything all on their own and is dead set on being right. To avoid causing the persistent spirited child from becoming upset, "try to find acceptable ways to make no into yes through appropriate compromise (for example, "It would not be safe for you to do that, but what if we did this instead? How would that be?".) (Positive Focus 9.7, p.238) The spirited child can also be given clean up warnings every few minutes to remind them that playtime will be over in a matter of time, always remember to honor each child's uniqueness and differences. Another characteristic of the spirited child is adaptability; they don't like change. "Has a hard time coping with changes in the environment, routine, schedule, food, and important people (Positive Focus 9.10, p.240)." They can come off as bossy or stubborn and can turn interactions with adults into negative interactions simply because they refuse to comply, making things confusing. To help ease some stress from the spirited child, we should give them the respect of letting them know ahead of time what will happen or things that will change. Children always have feelings of course; we must acknowledge the spirited child's feelings and make them feel encouraged to speak about their own feelings.
Miller, D. F. Positive Child Guidance, 8th Edition, Cengage