Reference no: EM133358640

Women's Roles

Statistics alone cannot describe all that has occurred since the 1960s with the redefinition of women's roles. Since the publication of The Feminine Mystique (Friedan, 1963), women the world over have urged each other to find equality in their relationships with men and in their places in the community and at work. This has not been an easy change for anyone involved. For women, it has meant adding new roles while often retaining much of the responsibility for household maintenance and child rearing. If a woman tries to combine all the roles she saw her mother play at home with her new work roles, she is in danger of falling into the "Superwoman" syndrome, with exhaustion and stress spilling over into all aspects of her life. Four out of every 10 women "often" or "very often" report feeling "used up" at the end of the workday. Working mothers are more likely to get sick than their husbands. Although women have cut back their household work from about 30 hours a week two decades ago to 18 hours a week today, their working husbands have not made up the difference, increasing their household work only from 5 hours to 10 hours, according to a recent report on American time use (BLS, 2013). Today, women work so they can contribute to the necessities for their families, as well as the items considered important for a rising family living standard. Recent statistics have found that an increasing number of married women are now the primary breadwinners in the family (Rampell, 2013). But it is more than a dollars-and-cents issue. Many women would not give up the satisfaction of work even if money were not an issue. Mothers working outside the home are likely here to stay. But this creates complexity in blending real and mythical issues about social roles. Work is not the only aspect of women's lives to be reconsidered. The language of the women's movement in the 1960s and 1970s spoke of women as one of society's minorities, without equality at home or outside the home. Issues of sexuality and reproduction and of sex role stereotypes and limitations were discussed nationwide. Some real changes were effected, and awareness was raised. The increase in marital instability may be partly attributable to this questioning of traditional relationships, and the women's movement may have been a major and permanent influence on the nature of families and society. Whether or not women and men agree with the push toward equality, it is virtually impossible for anyone in the country to remain untouched by the debate and its repercussions on lifestyles. But change comes through turmoil, and this environment of changing relationships and role behaviors has pushed women and men in the family into less comfortable territory.

Men's Roles

Men's family roles are on similarly challenging new ground. Not only are they asked to share positions and power in the workplace with women, but also at home, more is expected of them than was expected of their fathers. They may still not be carrying their equal share of household chores, but the days of hiding guilt-free behind the newspaper until dinner is on the table are gone. Gone also are the models of paternal behavior they knew as children. But after all, this is what happened to their fathers before them. As fathers received more leisure time due to changing work patterns and as the expert advice to parents continued to change from stern rigidity to concern with children feeling loved and happy, fathers became people with whom their children could have fun. Today's father plays with his child, but he also takes his turn sitting in the pediatrician's office, cooking dinner, supervising homework, and carpooling. Frequently, he is involved before his child's birth-attending childbirth classes with his wife to learn how to coach her through prepared childbirth (see Figure 2-8). But is this involvement as pervasive as some articles in women's magazines portray? The answer appears to be increasingly yes in families where mothers are "work committed"-that is, who work full time and share financial decisions. In these families, men are beginning to shrink the labor gap in the household and are becoming more involved with their children. One report says that men are now the primary caregivers in one out of every five dual-earner households with preschool children (Halle, 2002). This suggests that many more men have significant child care responsibilities than is usually thought. Certainly, the pressure for men to become more involved with household and child care responsibilities has come from women, especially those with growing economic power. But fathers themselves are frequently looking for a new lifestyle-one that allows them to be more involved with their families. Trying to find a balance between job and family responsibilities creates new stress for some fathers today. Although increased participation is occurring in many households, the primary responsibility for house and child care remains the mother's-perhaps due to the constraints of role behavior norms for men and women and the signals sent by society that moms are the parents who really count, while dads are in minor roles. One writer (Helms, 2000) offers the example of a school secretary trying to get in touch with the mother of a sick child. When asked by a coworker whether she had already called the father, she said she did not like to interrupt him. The implication is that Mom's work is more easily interruptible and anyway it is really her job to care for a sick child (an additional source of stress for working mothers) but also that Dad is either less caring or less capable of handling the emergency rather than equally competent and caring as Mom. Such implicit messages weaken men's attempts to be fully involved parents. Certainly, there are not a lot of models of highly participant fathers, and the few fathers who do participate equally as parents receive little recognition and support-at least in their perceptions. Many men who try to take time off to attend a teacher conference or school play get the impression that the boss and coworkers see them as slackers and expect the mothers-working or not-to handle such matters. Some research projects also show that men who attempt to take on more family responsibilities get increased negative feedback from grandparents and even from wives. The legacy of the model of male as breadwinner and female as caregiver may create stress for men trying to find new roles. But it is probably fair to say that today's father is often called on to share with his wife all aspects of the children's care and to display many of the nurturing behaviors previously associated only with mothers (see Figure 2-9). Indeed, one phenomenon that occurs in many communities is fathers becoming stay-at-home parents while their wives work outside the home. These fathers assume the full responsibility for the household and care of children that was previously thought to be the woman's role. To define what it means to be a man, major shifts in thinking are required. However men feel about it-and most fathers are pleased with their new roles-the change in women's roles in contemporary society has changed their own. Chapter 3 will look more at recent research on the absolute importance of fathers' involvement with their children's lives. It should also be noted that agreement about the desirability of this sharing of father and mother roles is not universal. A strong conservative orientation is currently advocating a return to "paternalism"-fathers being the strong voice in running the family and women returning to the home for primary responsibility in child rearing.

Slowly, society has been pushed to alter its expectations regarding the roles of family members, and individuals are caught between trying to balance the external realities and demands and the internal psychological conflict caused by attempting a new social pattern. The jury is still out on what impact the different patterns of family roles and parenting have on family members. Certainly, there are more opportunities for personal growth, with alternatives from which to choose freely. Children have a more inclusive family model as an increasing number of fathers take on the loving and nurturing aspects of parenthood and an increasing number of mothers take on leadership roles outside as well as inside the home. Changes in roles have opened doors for everyone-men and women alike.

QUESTIONS

Part 1. Using the information from the lecture and your textbook, Chapter 2, what is the impact of our history on:

Women's roles in the family?

Men's roles in the family?

Attitudes about children?

Part 2. Using the information from the lecture and your textbook, Chapter 2, what is the present-day attitude on:

Women's roles in the family?

Men's roles in the family?

Attitudes about children?